From "I Think I Can" to "All Done"

I have to admit that the I Heart Zines swap turned out to be a very satisfying project.

(my I Heart Zines front cover)
But I had doubts along the way...

The mere size of the zine was somewhat looming--five folded pages/20 sides (I chose a 8.5 by 5.5 format) and did I have enough in my noggin to fill those pages? If I did, how would I communicate my ideas?

I also was feeling some intimidation, without any basis as I don't know who I'm actually swapping with. But, typically, I was sure the other swappers' zines would shine up against my little first attempt:)

Lastly, would I be able to complete 10 copies before the November 13th deadline? I signed up to participate in mid-July...four months = easy peasy...right? But then that little bump in the road, my August hysterectomy, and a few other swaps I signed up for. I'm usually pretty good about timing my swap participation, but perhaps removing one's uterus affects one's wise swapping judgement! Suddenly it seemed that several swap deadlines were falling very close to one another!

(I Heart Zines back cover)
But this is where the satisfying part comes in...I did it! I finished my zine original, compiled 10 copies and popped them into the mail last Saturday, a full six days ahead of the deadline!

I took it one page at a time and focused on that project, not the twenty page project. I wrote about things I know (duh!). It's amazing how easy it is to fill a page with things you know, lol. And I ignored the intimidation, even if it didn't disappear completely...it was my zine--it could only reflect me--and that had to be good enough.

My pages were done in a cut-and-paste style...collaged backgrounds with printed text cut out and pasted onto the backgrounds. That style allowed me to really play with color and pattern and magazine/catalog pictures that I'd torn out and kept in a "I'll use it someday" file.


I included articles about my own discoveries of inspiration for color and creating...and lessons learned:) I talked about a couple of my favorite books and added a few helpful quotes I've come across. I talked about nature and traveling and laundry (yes, color inspiration in your laundry!)...and pinking shears, teehee. I included a copy of one of my smaller mixed media pieces and some quicky instructions for a patchwork pillow that mixes up four different patchwork blocks. And there are a few things tucked in for the other swappers to play with: fabric, ribbon, decorative paper, etc.

When Alma emailed me earlier this week to let me know that my package had arrived, she said some very nice things about my zine and it gave me just enough confidence to share it with others in my Etsy shop.

This is probably a good time for me to thank all of you for your sweet and encouraging blog comments over the past almost two years. It's the give and take of blogging, and the support of one another's artistic endeavors that gives me the push to try new things. What a gift...thank you!!

Marilyn

Rejected...or just not selected?

I wanted to show you a photo of a mixed media canvas I completed recently.


I enjoyed the process a lot. The canvas is 6 by 12 inches, an interesting size, especially turned vertically. I did a lot of layering with acrylic paints, gesso, rubber stamps, ephemera and the tea cup is an image transfer using clear packing tape. I've been encouraging myself to be less precise in my creating--more free, more loose. I don't know that I've come very far yet, but I do like slapping on paint and gel medium. That's a start, right?


I made this piece for ClothPaperScissors' Tea Party Challenge. The magazine was looking for mixed media art for their November/December 2008 issue celebrating home and hospitality. I'd never submitted anything to a magazine and thought I'd give it a try. I do like taking a theme and going with it.


ClothPaperScissors posted the results on Friday. My piece was not one selected for publication...oh, well. I do have to admit I was disappointed and felt rejected. And I wondered what to do with the canvas now. Do I want to keep it and forever be reminded of the disappointment?

Today, I was thinking that my blog could use an update and maybe I would show pictures of my Tea Party canvas. But how would I write about it? Could I just say 'this is something I've been working on and this is what I did'?

I decided to upload my photos first and when I looked at them I was aware that I still liked this piece even if it was rejected. And then I realized that it really wasn't rejected, it just wasn't on the list of those selected and that made a world of difference in my thinking.

But, even more, it helped me take a step towards seeing my art through my own eyes and not letting it's value be determined by others. For me, that's huge...and it feels GREAT! Now I know that I'm going to keep my Tea Party canvas and it's going to be a reminder of some valuable growth that happened today! Halleluja!

Marilyn